Anger and even outright fury are sometimes justified. You may encounter people who pass through your life with little consideration or respect. Certain events can make your blood boil, and the inability to control situations and outcomes can be frustrating. The good news is that none of these things have to control your life. In fact, if you can learn how to maintain a cool head and a calm disposition during the most challenging of times, you can avoid the negative consequences of acting on anger and you can gain more control over how things in your life work out. Following are four strategies for dealing with anger that can make even the toughest seasons infinitely more enjoyable.
Don’t Take It Personally
It Isn’t As Bad As It Appears To Be
Much of what makes dealing with anger boils down to perceived slights. When people are inconsiderate, thoughtless, manipulative, or genuinely unkind, you may perceive this as having more to do with you than who they are. The only individual that you have the power to control is yourself. Thus, you are the only person who’s actions, words or behaviors should genuinely bother you. If someone is mean or downright hateful to you, and for no apparent reason at all, remind yourself that this response is largely representative of who this individual is, rather than of who you are. When you don’t take perceived slights so personally, they’ll have a far lesser ability to affect your mood.
Most situations that cause furious responses aren’t as bad as they initially seem. This is why many people find themselves wishing that they’d reacted differently after having had the opportunity to cool down and reflect. Before you act out in anger, take a moment to practice deep breathing, go for walk, talk with a close friend, or write in your journal. Fueled by powerful emotions like anger, first responses tend to be both visceral and regrettable. When people take the time to address their emotions before reacting, they become far less likely to do or say things that they’ll eventually come to regret.
Find Your Peace
Some people know that talking a long walk is the best way to cool their tempers before they get out of hand. Others find themselves trapped in the heat of the moment and unable to find a calming way out. You have to identify the activities and practices that bring you peace. To do so, you have to push yourself to try different strategies in the heat of the moment. Start by trying deep, diaphragmatic breathing when you’re anger. If this doesn’t work, make a point of walking away from situations and conversations that are poised to you overreact. Once you find the strategy or strategies that actually works, be diligent in using these tools to keep your anger at bay and your words and actions in check.
